Glasto 2007 to be ‘Greatest Show on Earth!”

EavisFestival fatcat and posh hippie, Michael Eavis has promised that the 2007 Glastonbury will be the "biggest ever".

He told Uncut magazine: "What I can announce now is that I’m adding an extra 100 acres next year so it will be the biggest festival ever.

"I’m renting the additional land from a neighbour so there’s more space
and major improvements to the campsite. So it’s not just going to be
bigger, but better.

"We’re going to be presenting the best line-up anywhere in the world. Glastonbury 2007, will be, literally, the greatest show on Earth." When questioned about rumours of Kylie and Bruce Springsteen headlining, he quipped "All I can tell you at this stage is whatever rumours you’ve heard…they’re probably all true…"

It would seem that Eavis is confident about the most overrated biggest festival in the World, and obviously isn’t anticipating any backlash from usually disgruntled residents of nearby Glastonbury, Street and West Pennard.

Still, if you like camping with a bunch of hammered 15 year olds shouting ‘BOLLLOOOOCKS!!" at five in the morning, Glasto promises to be the greatest show on Earth.

Mof Gimmers

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